The Top TEN Fundas of a successful manager

Like good actors, good managers are born. By the same logic bad managers are also born. They may study in best of management institutes and consult best of management treatise but remain unmanageable themselves.

The top ten Fundas of a successful manager, not necessarily good manager (good manager is a myth) are given below for your benefit. Who knows with so much liberalization setting in you may be elevated or simply redesigned as a Manager one of these days.–

1--Subordinate is always at fault. This is different than saying boss is always right.
2– Give up politeness. Being polite is a symbol of weakness.
3– Keep one or two confidants who can bring you the latest news and explain you in simple terms, things you don't understand.
4– Do not hurry to dispose off files. If you do so, not only more files will pile up, you will be termed as casual and not being thorough.
5– In case you are under pressure to 'fix' responsibility and take up, catch hold of the last man in the row (lowest in rung)
6– Announce inquiry only after deciding what line inquiry should adopt and what would be the findings.
7– Feeling out of place in a discussion with nobody bothered/aware of your presence? Butt in by diverting the topic from Sahara to Antarctica or Vice Versa.
8– Keep them guessing and fighting among themselves. Avinash, Sekhar, Sai, Rama and Raghu need to be kissed and kicked as per occasion. Remember tale of wise monkey and stupid cats with a loaf of bread.
9– In case you simply fail to understand a subject, (after all managers too are human being) you want to avoid or want to kill the issue, try one of these:
Please discuss
Please link rules/instructions
Please link practice
Please quote precedent
Please call a meeting of section heads/inter-section/inter-dept/inter-ministry.
10– If all these fundas fail, go for this SOS - Discuss nation, national character and moral values. You can feel a strange hush overpowering the atmosphere.
Keep these top ten fundas clear and you would find `line clear' throughout your career.